By Michael Huckabee, Ph.D., professor and director of the University of Nebraska Medical Center Division of Physician Assistant Education. Dr. Huckabee has 30 years’ experience as a physician assistant, mostly in rural Nebraska.
Sometimes this time of year turns us off a bit. We lack the enthusiasm others have around us. In this otherwise season of happiness, we’re preoccupied with thoughts of people we miss, whether by death, distance or disappointment. We feel sad that things are not what they used to be. We’re not interested in singing carols, shopping for presents, or otherwise cavorting in holiday festivities. That’s the holiday blues.
This is not about serious clinical depression. If a person is having regular sleep disturbances, eating issues, relationship difficulties or missing work, help is needed beyond here.
But at some point the holiday blues are likely to color most of us. If your view is getting jaded, try these ideas.
Get out. Don’t trap yourself inside and alone. Be sure to enter the flow of human traffic and interact with others. This means not just sitting in the back row of a church service or theater, but actually engaging in an activity with others. When the store clerk asks if you need help, share what you are shopping for. Smile at your barista and ask how it’s going. At the drive-up window, pay for the car behind you.
Bake cookies. Getting involved in a low stress project with immediate rewards can do wonders. There is a sense of control in baking which often gets at a root cause of feeling out of sorts. Any risk of associated weight gain can be alleviated by committing to take the goodies to someone else (See “get out” above).
Pet a pet. Put aside challenging relationships by caring for a pet. A hamster provides routine, a clownfish offers playful tranquility, and a Schnauzer brings companionship and responsibility. Consider a visit to the pet store to explore options and consider what fits your lifestyle. With a little thoughtful preparation, the social bond can be uncomplicated, with risk-free, genuine expressions of feelings. The ability to share loving touches means you’re never alone.
Let music help. Research continues to show the benefits of music, from switching up your playlist to seeking tailored music therapy. The tunes work to adjust our mood, reminding us of better times and soothing hurts. This is not about blaring “Deck the Halls” through the earbuds. Sometimes it’s best to listen to music that matches our mood (e.g., melancholy songs for sad times or raucous songs for anger) because the sounds empathize with our feelings. We may find solace with our conflicted feelings as they can be better expressed by music than words. Pick out a favorite song or two that fits your own occasion. If you can interact with the song (like sing, play or dance), it may work even better.
The idea behind these suggestions is to get connected with life outside of ourselves. The holiday blues can paint us into a corner. What we most need at those times is to step out and find fresh ways to make life rosy again.