The winter holidays are rapidly approaching. This time of year brings great joy but can also bring stress for families who are juggling work, childcare, extra expenses and more. Gatherings with extended family and friends can be especially stressful when you have a child who is a picky eater or has a pediatric feeding disorder. To help focus these gatherings on sharing love and gratitude, rather than frazzled nerves, the Munroe-Meyer Institute Department of Pediatric Feeding Disorders has some helpful tips:
- Give yourself permission to take the night off. It is important to help picky eaters get the right nutrition and learn to like more foods over time, but social gatherings may not be the best place to work on this. Some children may be more willing to try new foods when their cousins do, but others feel self-conscious, get overstimulated or are just too busy chatting and playing in larger social groups to eat less-familiar foods. If you’ve experienced meltdowns or battles at holiday meals in the past, it is OK to allow your child to eat only preferred foods this year.
- Establish expectations in advance. Discuss the meal situation and the foods that will be served with your children, and try to come to an agreement about any aspect of the meal that may be difficult for them. You might discuss what and how much of each food they will eat, how many bites of a new food they will try or how long/whether they will be expected to sit at the table. You might want to share these expectations with others before the social event to try to avoid pressure from well-meaning, food-loving family members.
- Consider allowing your child to eat before the event. This can help everyone enjoy the gathering more. Your child does not get hangry, and you are reassured that your child has eaten a reasonably nutritious meal that evening.
- Focus on your child’s strengths and help others do so as well. It can be difficult when an entire event, such as a holiday meal, is centered on an area of great challenge for your child. It might be frustrating to see a child with feeding issues struggle to eat while the other children devour everything in sight. Please remember during these times that your child is so much more than a picky eater or a child with a feeding disorder. They are determined, funny, the best cuddler, great with technology, the cutest giggler, always the first to sing their heart out or able to bust the sweetest moves. Help your child show those talents off to extended family and friends, and I hope that you will have the happiest holiday season!